"Florida Man" is still at it

[Sunshine Carami]

methinks Ray is from Sunnyvale...but will take the opportunity to say how much I hates living in Florida

 

[Rose Karuna]

I actually kind of like the weirdness here but the the ridiculous traffic during tourist season, extreme bugs, low wages, high cost of living and extreme unfriendliness and overall rudeness has driven my husband and I to start looking for a place to retire in North or South Carolina.

 

[Essence Lumin]

Florida man throws pizza at dad after finding out he helped deliver him at birth

 

[Kokoro Fasching]

Florida woman chases parents with knife after they refused to take her to Outback

 

[Ava Glasgow]

Florida woman chases parents with knife after they refused to take her to Outback

Very disappointed she didn't do the Crocodile Dundee impression.

 

[Dakota Tebaldi]

A Florida substitute teacher upset over some school dispute tried to sabotage the school principal's daughter's birthday party by spreading human feces all over the tables and grills at the pavilion that had been rented for the party.

 

[Dakota Tebaldi]

Florida Man claims three syringes found inside his rectum during a strip-search at the county jail are "not his"

 

[Free]

Florida Man claims three syringes found inside his rectum during a strip-search at the county jail are "not his"

Not originally.

 

[Kamilah Hauptmann]

Florida man growing increasingly suspicious of the perfectly normal day he’s having

“I’m tempting fate just talking about it,” warned an anxious Peterson, 48, at his suburban home. “It’s almost dinner time and I haven’t felt compelled to do anything inexplicably insane. Last week alone I somehow managed to set myself on fire at a daycare, accidentally eat bath salts and bite a cop, and wander into an alligator enclosure where I had to punch my way to freedom. But today? Today I just went to work, got groceries, and mowed the lawn. I’m terrified. Something big has to be coming my way.”

 

[Kamilah Hauptmann]

 

[danielravennest]

Elon Musk: My other car is a submarine

 

[Sunshine Carami]

I actually kind of like the weirdness here but the the ridiculous traffic during tourist season, extreme bugs, low wages, high cost of living and extreme unfriendliness and overall rudeness has driven my husband and I to start looking for a place to retire in North or South Carolina.

Rose, I just can't stand these people anymore. Before I was laid off (30+ yrs wtf) I had to just stay silent with the christrian/conservative/fox friends frame of mind. I am so done.

 

[Dakota Tebaldi]

Well okay, I have to give this dude credit for being a bit more clever than our typical fare.

 

[Rose Karuna]

Ok, admittedly this is from York, PA but it has connections to Florida. Also, this is no way for any self respecting alligator to live.

Emotional Support Alligator Makes New Friends At Assisted-Living Facility

Wally, who shares his home with another gator, Scrappy, lives in a 300-gallon pond Henney built in his living room. He loves to watch TV and lay down on the couch or bed. His diet includes frozen rats and chicken.

“They aren’t for everyone,”Henney said. “But what can I say. I’m not normal.”

(nope, not normal at all)

 

[Kaimi Kyomoon]

Does this qualify? It happened in Florida.
Toddler imitates dad's arrest in viral video

 

[Katheryne Helendale]

Fisherman finds grenade, drives to Taco Bell before calling 911: Police

 

[Han Held]

Florida man says syringes found in his rectum aren't his

 

[Free]

Florida man says syringes found in his rectum aren't his

Not originally.

I like to reuse the funny ones.

 

[Katheryne Helendale]

Florida man thought he stole opioids, took laxatives instead

Needless to say, the rest of his day was pretty shitty.

 

[Dakota Tebaldi]

Florida man thought he stole opioids, took laxatives instead

Yeah, the jokes pretty much write themselves at that point don't they?