The Make us Laugh Challenge Thread

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[Archer]

Sound on.

 

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[Sid]

 

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How did Twitter convince us to start reading from the bottom?

 

[Lexxi]

How did Twitter convince us to start reading from the bottom?

I still read top down. But now it's like Jeopardy.

 

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[detrius]

 

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[Beebo Brink]

Grammar walks into a bar...

- The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.

- A verb walks into a bar, sees a beautiful noun, and suggests they conjugate. The noun declines.

- A bar was walked into by the passive voice.

- A malapropism walks into a bar, looking for all intensive purposes like a wolf in cheap clothing, muttering epitaphs and casting dispersions on his magnificent other, who takes him for granite.

- An oxymoron walked into a bar, and the silence was deafening.

- Hyperbole totally rips into this insane bar and absolutely destroys everything.

- A question mark walks into a bar?

- A non sequitur walks into a bar. In a strong wind, even turkeys can fly.

- A mixed metaphor walks into a bar, seeing the handwriting on the wall but hoping to nip it in the bud.

- Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They converse. They depart.

- A synonym strolls into a tavern.

- At the end of the day, a cliché walks into a bar -- fresh as a daisy, cute as a button, and sharp as a tack.

- A figure of speech literally walks into a bar and ends up getting figuratively hammered.

- An allusion walks into a bar, despite the fact that alcohol is its Achilles heel.

- The subjunctive would have walked into a bar, had it only known.

- A misplaced modifier walks into a bar owned by a man with a glass eye named Ralph.

- A simile walks into a bar, as parched as a desert.

- A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking to forget.

 

[Veritable Quandry]

A group of mathematicians walk into a bar.
The first one orders a pint.
The second orders a half pint.
The third asks for a quarter pint.
The bartender looks at the line, and pours 2 pints.

 

[Isabeau]

A group of mathematicians walk into a bar.
The first one orders a pint.
The second orders a half pint.
The third asks for a quarter pint.
The bartender looks at the line, and pours 2 pints.

Three Americans in a British bar?

It’s early and as a Canadian, pints confuse me.

 

[Veritable Quandry]

Three Americans in a British bar?

It’s early and as a Canadian, pints confuse me.

It was one of those pseudo-Irish Pub® chains.

 

[Sid]

It's simple. Use cl.

 

[Essence Lumin]

What do you get when you cross a mosquito with a mountain climber?

Nothing. You can't cross a vector and a scalar.

 

[CronoCloud Creeggan]

 

[Sid]