Unforgivable Crimes Against Food

[Katheryne Helendale]

There are some crimes that are just simply unforgivable:

These 16 Crimes Against Food Shall Not Be Forgiven | Buzzfeed

Darnk will especially love #7!

 

[Kamilah Hauptmann]

16 dinner plans right there.

 

[Clara D.]

4. May have done the ramen sammich out of desperation,
7. Maybe, but PB+banana is way better.
9. Whipped cream and fruit is teh yummy
12. That's how I eat my ramen cause I'm poor - hot dogs and velveeta

rest of those are WTF . . . WHY?

 

[Lady Darnk Juniorette]

The mayo on pizza is more gross than the banana and mayo sandwich, the sandwich seems like a troll where the pizza one I could actually see some one doing like ketchup on steak.

The fruit and whipped cream is a stretch, WHATS NEXT?!?! PEANUTBUTTER AND CHOCOLATE??!? The list would have been big enough without that one.

And the ramen sandwich was not what I was expecting, I was expecting some cooked ramen on a piece of bread.

Hot dogs and ramen are fine, but the cheese is a little odd but I get it.

 

[eku zhong]

Mayo on Pizza is a National Japanese Passtime.. so watch your language!!!! and cheese in ramen is pretty common in Korea.....

 

[Lady Darnk Juniorette]

Mayo on Pizza is a National Japanese Passtime.. so watch your language!!!! and cheese in ramen is pretty common in Korea.....

MAYO IS AN ABOMINATION AND MUST BE STOPPED!!!!!!

EGGS AND OIL IS NOT THAT GOOD!!!

 

[Dakota Tebaldi]

- I don't see anything inherently wrong with whipped cream on fruit.

- I believe the "frosted steak" is photoshopped.

- I also think the sliced hot dogs in the ramen soup is technically fine, you can put practically any meat in ramen honestly. I guess it would depend on the flavor of the soup. I don't think I would put cheese on ramen personally, but it already is an actual ramen flavor so there's that. If I did add cheese it would be shredded.

 

[Lady Darnk Juniorette]

*goes one step further*

AND WHATS UP WITH PEOPLE PUTTING BUTTER ON THEIR SANDWICHES?!?!?! YUM, COLD BUTTER ON MY SANDWICH!!!!!!!

EEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!

 

[Dakota Tebaldi]

*goes one step further*

AND WHATS UP WITH PEOPLE PUTTING BUTTER ON THEIR SANDWICHES?!?!?! YUM, COLD BUTTER ON MY SANDWICH!!!!!!!

EEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!

I agree. Butter is for toast, and making grilled cheese sammiches or melts.

 

[Katheryne Helendale]

- I don't see anything inherently wrong with whipped cream on fruit.

- I believe the "frosted steak" is photoshopped.

- I also think the sliced hot dogs in the ramen soup is technically fine, you can put practically any meat in ramen honestly. I guess it would depend on the flavor of the soup. I don't think I would put cheese on ramen personally, but it already is an actual ramen flavor so there's that. If I did add cheese it would be shredded.

I tried the Nissin cheddar cheese Cup o Noodles before. It was actually kinda nasty. And the noodles weren't ramen, but a very narrow and thin fettuccine. And I didn't buy just one and try it. No, I went whole-hog and bought a whole 12 pack of them, so I really grew to detest the stuff!

Whipped cream on fruit isn't bad, actually. But it depends on the fruit. Whipped cream on cherries or berries works well. Whipped cream on watermelon or citrus, not so much.

 

[Katheryne Helendale]

*goes one step further*

AND WHATS UP WITH PEOPLE PUTTING BUTTER ON THEIR SANDWICHES?!?!?! YUM, COLD BUTTER ON MY SANDWICH!!!!!!!

EEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!

I actually like butter (well, margarine, actually) on my PB&Js. I guess I'm just weird like that. My husband always gives me that "OMG what is wrong with you" look whenever he sees me put it on my sandwiches.

For lunchmeat and cheese sandwiches, I use mayo.

 

[Lady Darnk Juniorette]

I actually like butter (well, margarine, actually) on my PB&Js. I guess I'm just weird like that. My husband always gives me that "OMG what is wrong with you" look whenever he sees me put it on my sandwiches.

For lunchmeat and cheese sandwiches, I use mayo.

*dies*

 

[Free]

AND WHATS UP WITH PEOPLE PUTTING BUTTER ON THEIR SANDWICHES?!?!?! YUM, COLD BUTTER ON MY SANDWICH!!!!!!!

Where's the evidence you heat up your mustard? Or do you use it straight from that cold box called a refrigerator?

 

[Katheryne Helendale]

On the other hand, I love mayo. I will even put it on a hot dog on occasion. And add spinach.

Actually, that sounds strangely intriguing. Fresh spinach?

 

[Dakota Tebaldi]

My hot dogs get, in no particular order:

ketchup
brown mustard
diced onion
dill relish

Chili dogs get:

chili (duh)
shredded sharp cheddar
diced onion

Bratwurst gets brown mustard and nothing else. That's if I put anything on it at all - often it goes bare.

 

[Free]

RE: hot dogs, Instead of the relish some time, try diced tomato and pickle with the onion. It works!

 

[Tigar]

For the most part, I agree with all the made up offensive foods. However, it is glaringly incorrect in at least two points:

#4: Boil de fuckin’ Ramen, wtf is wrong with you?

#7: Dat’s not how ya make a ‘nanner n’ mayo sammitch, ya wanker.
Ya don’t slice de nanners lengthwise, ya slice em horizontally
As Clara mentioned above, add the butter of the peanut .
For extra yum , add honey .

#B: what was left out is that ketchup is a terrible thing ta do ta a poor innocent ‘mater .

 

[Free]

Returning to tomatoes, can I get a shout out for lentils (or beans) with slices of tomato?

 

[Lady Darnk Juniorette]

Where's the evidence you heat up your mustard? Or do you use it straight from that cold box called a refrigerator?

Mustard is taken out of the coldener so it has time to uncold before use, the heat of the food should do the rest.

And unrelated, I had a "french toast" bagel and put chunky peanutbutter on it while it was still warm.

It was a fackn horror show. (Tasted good tho)

 

[Lady Darnk Juniorette]

SNOT BERRIES (tomatoes) ARE ONLY GOOD FOR MAKING SAUCE, KETCHUP AND TOPPING TACOS, ALL OTHER USES ARE PERVERTED ACTS OF CULINARY MALICE!!!!