'Twas the last trading day before Christmas

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Stock markets suffer their worst Christmas Eve trading day

Twas the last trading day before Christmas, and on the trading floor,
Most stocks were falling, and then falling some more,
Treasury Secretary Steven Mnuchin all the banks had called,
In hopes that full coffers were still in their vaults.


The analysts were shaken by news of the call,
which initially caused the stock market to fall,
Then President Trump took to Twitter, to blame the Federal Reserve,
Which was something the Fed chairman just didn’t deserve.


So banks and traders rushed to their phones with a clatter,
Causing stock market value further to shatter,
Markets don’t like decisions made in a flash,
And criticizing sound economic policy can exacerbate a crash.


Mnuchin made his call with banks from a tropical isle,
and analysts criticized his decision’s lack of guile,
They were more concerned with policy stupidity,
Since there’s already enough administrative volatility.
Like threatening to oust the chairman of the Federal Reserve,
Someone whose position it would be better to preserve.


So now the Dow has fallen some 653 points,
And doctors may advise traders to light up their joints,
Because U.S. indices are on track for their worst December,
Since the 1930s, which almost no one alive remembers.
 

Kamilah Hauptmann

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Barry's a successful Wall Street finance shitlord. And not a big fan of fascism.
 
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Kara Spengler

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Ugh, don't remind me. It seems every day apple gets a new low and the idiot in chief is not helping by his proclamations either.

The only good news is this also affects congresscritters too, even if not as much as people with retirement accounts. I always said donnie would be history as soon as they started to be personally affected.
 
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Zaida Gearbox

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Fucking NPR said that the stock market fell by 65%. I almost had a heart attack. As it is I'm considering emptying my IRA and putting the money in precious metal which I have confidence with actually be there when I retire as opposed to my IRA which I have little confidence will be there when I retire.
 
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Fucking NPR said that the stock market fell by 65%. I almost had a heart attack. As it is I'm considering emptying my IRA and putting the money in precious metal which I have confidence with actually be there when I retire as opposed to my IRA which I have little confidence will be there when I retire.
Huh? That would be catastrophic. How could they say that?
 
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Katheryne Helendale

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Fucking NPR said that the stock market fell by 65%. I almost had a heart attack. As it is I'm considering emptying my IRA and putting the money in precious metal which I have confidence with actually be there when I retire as opposed to my IRA which I have little confidence will be there when I retire.
A 65% drop in the stock market would have been a cataclysmic crash the likes of which I don't think we've ever seen! The stock market has been very bearish the last few weeks, but the Dow shot up by over a thousand points today. That said, I think investors are in for a really bumpy ride for the foreseeable future and may end up notably lower than it started off as.
 

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I can't remember which specific news show I was watching yesterday, where the discussion touched on Trump's firing of Janet Yellen "because she was too short." Literally, he didn't like that she was such a small person. Ironically, she was actually MORE in line with Trump's policy of low interest rates, yet he replaced her with a new Fed chief who is raising interest rates.

You can't make this stuff up.
 
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Kara Spengler

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I can't remember which specific news show I was watching yesterday, where the discussion touched on Trump's firing of Janet Yellen "because she was too short." Literally, he didn't like that she was such a small person. Ironically, she was actually MORE in line with Trump's policy of low interest rates, yet he replaced her with a new Fed chief who is raising interest rates.

You can't make this stuff up.
I heard it on some MSNBC program. Most shows there have had the B team this week so I am not sure which one precisely, probably Maddow's slot or Last Word. I loved the comment about maybe there were some binders on a high shelf.