In my free time I like to draw. One subject of interest is skulls. Usually, I have to search the web for images of skulls, but I know a biologist so I called them up and asked if I could borrow a cast (not real) skull. They said that they never loan out a skull because they will forget who they loaned it to and it just disappears. Online they go for $300 to 2k. She had the ones that are not cut open above the eyes so you can open into the brain cavity that are obviously for study. They look more real as they were cast from real skulls and thus have some of the character and damage of the originals. I think they are rather sturdy plastic with a little heft. They are all two pieces with a detached mandible. In addition to human skulls, she had other mammals including apes and monkeys that have fangs. Strangely, she said she would be willing to loan out all of the skulls and that way they will not forget who has what. I agreed and grinning I took a huge box of skulls home.
My wife saw the box and asked me what was in it. I said, "skulls."
She said, "no really, what is in the box?"
She did not believe me. I can imagine bringing a big box of legos a colleague's family was passing on or something like that and upon being asked saying 'skulls' or some other random improbable item just to be funny because who would ever have expected a box of skulls?
I said, "skulls."
She got mad and said, "Fine! Don't tell me!"
Now at this point I have had my fun. She was indeed surprised by my answer and I could have filled in the details of how and why I got the skulls and when I had to return them, but I was told not to tell her so I did that. I complied stubbornly and with perhaps a bit of malice because her extreme reaction surprised me and I freeze up and become defensive when surprised because of my childhood.
She grew up with older brothers and they were always teasing her growing up. You can be sure her orange juice had gummy worms in it. She has a short fuse for foolery. On the other hand I was the oldest with a stern and overly firm step mother and I learned to do as I was told to the letter lest I face the consequences which go beyond the scope of this post. I put on stubbornness just as she wanted an explanation.
She asked again and I said that I had answered the question and besides, I had just been told not to say any more. I think we were both a bit steamed.
She didn't get an explanation because I stuck by her command to not say anything. She pondered for a while and I didn't see when she slipped to another part of the house to get closer to the box. When she was near it she pounced on it and opened it up. I didn't even see her. Without context or explanation she got an eyeful of scale sized skulls. I saw her talking to herself, "he said skulls. These are skulls. A boxful of skulls." It is kind of a moment of shock. The skulls were not neatly stacked. Just jumbled mandibles and craniums.
Of course this was not what I had imagined when I came home with the box of skulls. I rather wanted the enthusiasm and wonder that I had having scored a drawing experience that would be difficult to have in normal circumstances. I was excited. Well, it was botched, but I explained the details after she had found that I had not been sarcastic. We recovered gradually and it all kind of played out again when the kids came home from school.
Edit: Part 2. what happened with the kids (by request)
They got surprised by the box of skulls too.
My daughter scheduled a scary movie night with friends. My son buried a monkey skull (smaller) in veggie sticks ( the salty snack ones that look like French fries). My wife was like, "oh no you don't. We don't do that here!"
During the film (hush) one of the girls pulled out a monkey mandible with fangs. It was dark but a surprise to everyone. Much screaming. Turns out my wife only removed the cranium. The mandible was still in there buried in veggie sticks. No one knew.
It turned into a sleepover. Fine. They were up later than me. I had to work so I got up. No shower. No nothing. Just get out of the house. On the way out I noticed they arranged all the skulls in a row perfectly pairing each cranium with its mandible. That is a difficult task. As I get a handful of cereal to munch on the way out the door I'm inspired. I put an oaty oh in each eye socket. I'm out to work.
I heard later they thought no one had been downstairs before them and they were certainly last to bed so they could not explain the cereal in the eye sockets. It was terrifying. Much screaming.
When Halloween came around, one of them dressed as an oaty o.