Elon f*cks Twitter

[Free]

"It didn't go through." ~Elon Musk

Quote of year.

 

[Argent Stonecutter]

Too big to fail has entered the chat.

That would be Boeing.

 

[Kamilah Hauptmann]

Guys I think there's something wrong with the Muskrats

Bro absolutely will never understand women.

 

[Isabeau]

Guys I think there's something wrong with the Muskrats

 

[Kamilah Hauptmann]

 

[Free]

Twitter shareholder sues Elon Musk for tanking the company’s stock

Twitter stock continues to trade well below the buyout price.

www.theverge.com

 

[GoblinCampFollower]

well yeah.... the dumb fuck incels who wish they were Elon Musk think wealth is all women care about, so OBVIOUSLY Elon is the sexiest man alive... so by their reasoning, this woman must be a liar or insane.

...I honestly feel a bit bad for them because many of these guys genuinely can't figure out what in the world would make a man beautiful or charming. So they basically have driven themselves insane trying to figure out what in the world straight or bi women would actually look for in a man.

 

[Dakota Tebaldi]

 

[Argent Stonecutter]

So what's the latest on him buying/not buying twitter?

 

[Dakota Tebaldi]

At the last minute, having already signed an agreement with Twitter in which he agreed to waive due diligence, Elon suddenly called a stop to the sale claiming an acute interest in whether greater or fewer than 5% of Twitter accounts are bots and claiming that this random and unimportant statistic was central to his decision to make the buy offer. He now says the sale will not proceed until Twitter provides some kind of "proof" that less than 5% of Twitter accounts are bots.

Twitter is not interested in providing this information and it's unclear how Twitter is supposed to go about obtaining an exact figure with any confidence anyway. Providing it is also, allegedly, not required by the language of the agreement in which - again - Musk already waived due diligence. They have said that they fully intend to enforce the agreement, though - by which they mean, the agreement says that if for any reason Musk backs out he has to pay Twitter something like $1 billion and they will pursue that.

I'm not aware of any developments since all that came out - except Elon declaring himself a Republican because Democrats are meanies in order to preempt that whole horse-for-a-wank scandal dropping, and Tesla's stock taking a huge hit from which it still hasn't recovered, forcing Elon to restructure the financing of his buy offer.

 

[Essence Lumin]

and Tesla's stock taking a huge hit from which it still hasn't recovered,

That's an understatement. April 4th was the day Elon announced to the world he had bought a bunch of Twitter stock.

 

[Free]

Tesla stock owners are used to Crazy Elon's erratic behavior/swinging TSLA graphs. They're just thinking "wait six months."

 

[Kamilah Hauptmann]

https://www.theonion.com/point-counterpoint-a-self-driving-tesla-ran-over-my-so-1848862188

 

[Dakota Tebaldi]

 

[Free]

The Big Interview. lol

 

[Free]

This is not about Crazy Elon buying, or wanting to buy, or now not wanting to buy, Twitter, but it's so stupid I can't be bothered to find a better place for it.

Hard Drive is a parody news site for gamers. Crazy Elon was caught tweeting their stuff but without any identifying bits. Hard Drive called him out on it (as well as made fun of him for "10 years to Mars or bust" and other low pickings), and now Crazy Elon is calling their work (i.e. the stuff he's been tweeting) "not that funny" because it's "woke."

I think that's all one needs to know about this story. And about Crazy Elon.

 

[Dakota Tebaldi]

Oh but we're missing the best part, which is where Sky News in Australia actually did a video report on this exchange where they basically just read the tweets but their takeaway at the end was that Elon totally burned Hard Drive and everybody clapped.

 

[Dakota Tebaldi]

 

[Argent Stonecutter]

Even Elon has heard of Plato's cave, the worst take in all of philosophy. Next he's going to start in on Bostrom's simulation theory.

 

[Noodles]

At rhis point maybe Twitter should just give in to Elon's failed deal and pay him the billion dollars sonits off the table, then ban him. I am sure there is a viable reason in there.