LOL! Political ZOMGWTF

[Free]

 

[Jopsy Pendragon]

Sorry, but trade me your wife for this rock or I'll show you God?

Don't wait 3 weeks, you fashion icon - SHOW ME GOD NOW.

(Kind of presumptuous of this guy to not sign this, or provide some way of contacting him for the God stone/FLOTUS trade.)

So much to poke fun at.... but the "or I will reveal God's existence to your people in the most incredible way possible" seems ... redundant. Their revelations are already beyond credibility. So... Mission accomplished?

 

[Innula Zenovka]

 

[Innula Zenovka]

 

[Argent Stonecutter]

I assume this isn't a lockpicking technique.

 

[CronoCloud Creeggan]

I had to look the term up just now, it is snorting a drug off a key. So Cawthorne is familiar with drug culture, very interesting.

 

[Free]

I assume this isn't a lockpicking technique.

I'd give you a screwdriver to help with that, but then it might be taken the wrong way.

 

[Free]

He puts an illegal hold on the tree 7 seconds in.

 

[Jopsy Pendragon]

He puts an illegal hold on the tree 7 seconds in.

I don't get it. Punching bits off a diseased/termite-ridden is some kind of display of manliness?
Or is this just a metaphor for how he deals with morning wood?

 

[WolfEyes]

I'd give you a screwdriver to help with that, but then it might be taken the wrong way.

For when a screwdriver might be taken the wrong way.

 

[WolfEyes]

He puts an illegal hold on the tree 7 seconds in.

They care so much about not destroying the environment we all have to live in.

 

[Dakota Tebaldi]

I, another private citizen who is not a government employee either, was also closely monitoring the situation by occasionally checking my social media feeds.

 

[danielravennest]

I don't get it. Punching bits off a diseased/termite-ridden is some kind of display of manliness?
Or is this just a metaphor for how he deals with morning wood?

I've owned 100 acres of timber land in the past, and currently have 3 acres of woods at home, from which I get my own wood for woodworking.

What he is doing is *stupid*. If that part of the sapling is so rotten, it is likely the higher parts are too, and shaking it like that can make it fall on his head. The forestry term for standing dead wood like that is "widowmaker". What you can do with rotten stuff like that is get a pole (the woods are full of them) with a large side branch near the top and use the forked end to push it over from a safe distance. Alternately you can tie a rope to it as high as you can reach, make a 90 degree turn around a good tree nearby, and pull it down. The turn is so you are not in the line it will fall. There are other methods, but those are basic ones for a sapling this size.

What an

 

[Jopsy Pendragon]

I've owned 100 acres of timber land in the past, and currently have 3 acres of woods at home, from which I get my own wood for woodworking.

What he is doing is *stupid*. If that part of the sapling is so rotten, it is likely the higher parts are too, and shaking it like that can make it fall on his head. The forestry term for standing dead wood like that is "widowmaker". What you can do with rotten stuff like that is get a pole (the woods are full of them) with a large side branch near the top and use the forked end to push it over from a safe distance. Alternately you can tie a rope to it as high as you can reach, make a 90 degree turn around a good tree nearby, and pull it down. The turn is so you are not in the line it will fall. There are other methods, but those are basic ones for a sapling this size.

When I was a in high school in AZ, a man was killed because saguaro cactus he was using for target practice FELL on him. https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/man-killed-saguaro-cactus/

Shame karma is rarely as reliable.

 

[Free]

For when a screwdriver might be taken the wrong way.

Oh, so now we need a Swiss army knife reaction... Thanks, Obama.

 

[WolfEyes]

The forestry term for standing dead wood like that is "widowmaker".

You know what a widowmaker is to a logger right? They're lots worse than standing dead wood less then 10 years old.

Just messing with you a bit. There are different "kinds" of widowmakers that loggers encounter far more often than forestry rangers. I'd rather be a ranger than a logger though. The last two are the kind that are the most dangerous for loggers because they are unpredictable. They can start rolling in more than one direction and you can't tell which way it will go for sure. Close enough only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades.

ETA: oops Almost forgot to put this in for those who are curious.



I know I don't have to prove anything, but I thought Dakota might be interested in a little history. I grew up across the street from the Maxwells of Maxwell Lumber. The kids' names were, Loretta, Ann, Winston and Robert in order of age. Robert took over the family business (I think) and Winston was murdered RIP. Robert and I are close in age.

Thanks for the memories.

ETA: They had a Dalmatian named George.

 

[Dakota Tebaldi]

 

[Free]

 

[Free]

 

[Free]

Corporate suits are so adorable.