Do you give to panhandlers?

[Arilynn]

I’ve seen a lot of panhandlers this summer. They are always on busy intersections and usually have a sign of some kind. On NextDoor, which seems like hell painted entirely in ecru, very excited posters insist it’s all people working orchestrated scams that reap them tons of money. Perhaps, but it doesn’t seem that way. My opinion waivers, but I often abide by the advice of man who has been a mentor and pillar in my life. Many years ago, he was a major drug addict and alcoholic who got money through credit card fraud. He got clean long before I met him and helps with AA interventions. When I asked him this question, he said that he did give. I was surprised, and he explained that if anyone is so desperate for money - including drug money - to beg strangers, he would give.

I recently gave an intersection panhandler cash and a bottle of water in a way that stopped 3 lanes of traffic and could have killed the person. I felt awful. But I also feel awful for the people with signs, standing in all sorts of weather, asking for money.

Do you give, and what’s your perspective on this issue?

 

[Marita]

Yeah ... Some coins and a few dollar bills cluttering my pocket or wallet will not cause me distress at their loss and may be what just helps the one with their hand held out for help.

 

[Rose Karuna]

I keep some money in the console of my car for just this reason. I figure they must be pretty desperate to stand on a corner all day with a sign in 90+ degree heat and humidity. I like your idea of handing out water too. I could throw some extras into a bag in the car.

 

[Noodles]

I used to but to much anymore. I am not big on giving money and often do not carry money.

Two that I do remember. I once was getting back to work from McDonalds. A guy asked for money, said he was hungry. I didn't have cash but gave him my MvDonalds. As I went in the building, I saw him toss the bag on the ground after a short walk. Like dude, I was going to eat that.

Another, while up in Chicago for work, I was waiting at a cross walk and this guy was pretty charasmatic and said he wasn't asking for money, but wanted to see if I wanted to buy a guide book. I guess it's some program they do for panhandlers, have them sell these books, maybe it was a scam. I told him he I didn't need the book but gave him some cash anyway because at least he seemed like he was trying and not just begging like a lot of others. Well, it was more polite than that, but that was the idea.

Part of my issue is that some of them seem to have made a career out of it. Like there is this one dude always on the same corner in town here, has a little chair, he has been there for at least ten years. Like hey, you know there are proper programs and all that right? You don't come off like an addict type that would have trouble on that route. I have seen him a few times miles away at the Walmart as well, which suggests he also has a car somewhere.

 

[Innula Zenovka]

When I asked him this question, he said that he did give. I was surprised, and he explained that if anyone is so desperate for money - including drug money - to beg strangers, he would give.

I too generally take the attitude that, if someone needs the money badly enough to beg strangers for it, they need it more than do I.

 

[Beebo Brink]

It's been decades since I lived in a big city with droves of panhandlers, but even in our small town we'll encounter someone who asks for money. Once a young woman came up to our car as we were unloading it in front of our house, other times they'll hit us up as we're approaching the neighborhood 7-11 convenience store. Very rarely they'll actually ring the doorbell, although that's much more likely to be the "do you have a spare job?" request. Whenever possible, we give. In the case of the young woman, I think we gave her $20. Maybe she really did need it for milk for her kids, or maybe it was drug money, either way she was obviously desperate and I'd rather take the chance that I'm enabling someone's drug habit than have children going hungry.

A handout isn't a fix, but I'm in no position to fix society. I'll settle for getting someone through the next hour, or the next day.

 

[Kokoro Fasching]

I carry gift cards for the local restaurants and in the winter small cheap backpacks with various items. I almost never carry cash, so only hand out those items.

 

[Stora]

I sometimes give money and I often here people say that the beggars will only spend it on drugs or alcohol.
I don't care if they do because I probably would if I was that desperate.

One time while I was waiting to meet someone in a small town high street. I was watching an older homeless guy who I had seen a few times before. He was sat in a closed shop doorway with everything he owned in a few plastic carrier bags. A lady sat down on a bench close by and he went over and offered to light her cigarette, she accepted and he went back to sit in the doorway.

It impressed me that he was still an old fashioned gentleman even though life had not dealt him a good hand.
So I went over to the ATM and withdrew £10 and gave it to him. He said thanks and stood there thinking for a few minutes and then he turned to me with a smile on his face and said he was going to treat himself to some fish n chips.

Seeing him smile and knowing he would have a warm meal that day made me feel good too.

 

[Innula Zenovka]

I sometimes give money and I often here people say that the beggars will only spend it on drugs or alcohol.
I don't care if they do because I probably would if I was that desperate.

One time while I was waiting to meet someone in a small town high street. I was watching an older homeless guy who I had seen a few times before. He was sat in a closed shop doorway with everything he owned in a few plastic carrier bags. A lady sat down on a bench close by and he went over and offered to light her cigarette, she accepted and he went back to sit in the doorway.

It impressed me that he was still an old fashioned gentleman even though life had not dealt him a good hand.
So I went over to the ATM and withdrew £10 and gave it to him. He said thanks and stood there thinking for a few minutes and then he turned to me with a smile on his face and said he was going to treat himself to some fish n chips.

Seeing him smile and knowing he would have a warm meal that day made me feel good too.

When I can, I always try to give people £10 (or £20 if I'm feeling particularly sorry for them) rather than just whatever spare change I have to hand, which feels to me somewhat demeaning for both parties.

As you suggest, seeing people smile and knowing that you've given them a good surprise is generally worth more than most other things I'd have spent the money on.

 

[GoblinCampFollower]

When I can, I always try to give people £10 (or £20 if I'm feeling particularly sorry for them) rather than just whatever spare change I have to hand, which feels to me somewhat demeaning for both parties.

I did that once in college... I had nothing in my wallet, so I just gave him all my coins... he thanked me but I was embarrassed... it was kind of just a reflex.

Under normal circumstances I often give them 5-10 dollars.

 

[Romana]

I used to commute to New York City, and there was this paper called the Street News, about the homeless, and the proceeds went to help them..It was also sold by them. They'd go from car to car giving their speech and selling their papers. I always bought the paper from them. They were that proud of doing it instead of begging.
I even wrote a song about it, when there was supposed to be a benefit concert,which sadly never came to pass.
Where I live now, I don't see people panhandling. I do see folks sitting on the steps of the church down the street, which helps the needy /homeless. They don't beg, though, so I assume --I hope -- they're in programs that help them.

 

[Free]

I chose "rarely" because "sometimes, it depends" was not an option.

Also, no pie option. What, do I have to beg for it?

 

[WolfEyes]

I rarely have anything extra so I have to choose between keeping my head above water or trying to keep someone else from going down and end up with us both drowning.

There is a group of homeless people in my town that do organized panhandling. It is getting more and more prevalent. There are certain places they will gather as a group to make their plans at certain times of the day. Some have some severe mental issues. It's heartbreaking to see and even more heartbreaking to not be able to help. The look in their eyes when I have no choice but to turn away. Then there are those who really could use a helping hand momentarily.

It isn't going to get any better.

 

[Jopsy Pendragon]

This one time, I gave money to a guy. Later he saw me and saw what home I went into... and he came and banged on the door looking for more. My roommate was expecting a package not a homeless guy spilling his rehearsed hard-luck spiel looking for money, and since he couldn't get a word in edgewise... he closed the door in his face.

The guy banged again, then broke the cover off the fire alarm pull by my door and yanked it. We couldn't figure out how to reset it, so moments later we had a big-ass fire truck parked out front and hunky firemen swarming around trying to find the reset panel. Fun times. Except the alarm was so loud I had tinnitus for days afterwards.

Even though there are -several- dozen homeless sleeping on the streets and in canyons in my zipcode, very few of them actually panhandle. Many rely on handouts from local businesses. Several dig through dumpsters and public trash cans (leaving litter strewn everywhere) to collect cans for the recycling deposit. Some sell trinkets and "art" on the sidewalk especially on weekends and during the farmer's market. They seem to get by modestly well, considering.

And then there's the fights. Most don't turn into brawls but there's a lot of angry shouting, mostly at other homeless people.

But when it comes to giving them money, anyone within 3 blocks of my home is an automatic 'no. sorry guy/ma'am'. Same for regulars I see near home when they're outside that radius. As for everyone else, I'm still not particularly generous. Especially with those that seem well practiced at it. The newbies who clearly don't have much street experience yet I'm more likely to help out with a $5 or $20 though, in the hope that maybe they can get themselves off the street before they resign themselves to it.

 

[Ellen Cordeaux]

For me it varies person to person. I always first ask 'are you a veteran' and if they say yes I give them the business card to the veteran's aid office where I used to work along with a dollar or two. Most of them want nothing to do with help from the government but you never know.

As for the ones who come up to the car at Target I will usually ask them if I can buy them some food instead. If they say yes I go back inside and get them something. If they say no, and quite a few do, then I say I don't have any cash on me. The addicts I can spot easily from working in that industry and sometimes I'll try to engage them. 'So this going into your stomach or a pipe?' A lot of them are surprisingly candid when asked outright. Those I decide case by case how to deal with, but I always have a bunch of singles in the door just in case.

We used to have a guy around here for years we called Mr. Bridge (because he was always under the freeway overpass). I always would give him something; a few dollars, some water, a sandwich. The neighborhood at large took care of him. We knew he was a Veteran and he never actually asked for anything. We all took care of him; especially during the cold months. He had many sleeping bags and food for his dog, etc., all provided by the neighborhood. We stopped seeing him 2 or 3 years ago, so assume he's passed on. I like to think we helped make his life a little easier.

 

[Soen Eber]

If it's a woman I often help out with a few bucks, but I'm not making much myself (although I do have savings).

 

[Aribeth Zelin]

I answered most of the time; because its one of those things where, if I have something I'll give it.

But I always try and give them my attention.

 

[Ellie]

Anyone I see walking along the streets or in traffic selling or collecting trash gets whatever I can afford at that moment. The smiles and gratitude often leave me in tears as I walk away and return to my comfy but very modest home.

I aim to express my Mum's attitude, "There but for the grace of god, go I."

ETA Bonus mummerism: On seeing a US televangelist," Why is that man shouting at god?"

She was never a 'religious' person, but had her own beliefs and a code that has translated nicely to support me throughout my life.

 

[bubblesort]

Depends on where I am. In a big city like New York or Philly, I won't even bum other people a smoke, unless I'm lost and need directions or something. I don't care if they're homeless or a 1%er, I got shit to do. I'm not walking down the street in Philly to meet people, and I don't like pulling out my wallet in public when I'm in cities like that. Also, there's just too many homeless people in a city to really help the problem that much. I will help at a soup kitchen, especially when my food not bombs friends puts out a call for help, but I usually won't actually give in person in cities. It's a bad situation, because I know that giving cash is the most efficient way to help them, but, you know... I don't usually carry enough cash to help all those people. The numbers overwhelm me.

In a small town? Hell yeah, I'll toss the local homeless guy a few bucks.

 

[danielravennest]

No, I give to food pantries instead. That way at least it goes to feeding people rather than a habit. Also the lady who was a tenant and then started buying my old house was out of work due to the pandemic, so I let her go without making payments for a year.