The Coddling of the American Mind

[Ayesha]

When I first heard the term microaggressions, I thought "I’ve been experiencing those my whole life, and I’ve learned to tune them out." Sure, some go beyond micro and those register in my memory as harmful, but if you’re so fragile you can’t cope with clueless people, I don’t understand how you will get through life. This alone gives me hope that once these kids get into the real world, they'll either mellow out or find themselves socially ostracized for being insufferably politically correct. I mean, in high school I became vegetarian and for a while I would annoy my parents by commenting on their dead cow sandwich and things like that. But eventually I realized I wasn’t accomplishing anything other than alienating people. I stopped judging other people‘s decisions and years later I stopped being a vegetarian, though I’m still supportive of others who are. Some people never outgrow this nonsense, like the "friend" who unfriended me on social media after I casually mentioned in a PM conversation with her that I was no longer vegetarian. But most do.

I think the goal of education in general and college should be to teach people so they naturally won’t engage in micro and macro aggressions, not call them out on every single mistake, especially when a mistake was well intended or simply clueless. The current strategy serves more to shame people into silence and/or make them too afraid to ask questions or engage with people from a minority group. It can even turn someone against a particular community if they're trying to learn and just get hostile responses.

 

[Jopsy Pendragon]

Micro aggressions are a sign of disrespect. Passive/negligent/oblivious or active/hostile/intentional... Doesn't matter. You don't fix the problem by rewarding it with silence and compliance. It won't just go away, it will get worse... As people explore how far they can push before getting called out on it.

I'm not saying make a scene every time, that's tiresome. Randomness is essential, if that can't predict how your will react, they're going to at least think twice before they go pushing buttons. Which, though not much, is still more consideration than they were giving before.

 

[Innula Zenovka]

I think part of the problem is that while students have always said and done stuff that seems with handsight to have been pretty stupid, it's only comparatively recently that everyone's had a platform that allows them to say this stuff, and to have news of their doings broadcast, to a global audience. It's a sure-fire way to make immense mountain ranges out of a couple of molehills.

A couple of years ago we had something similar here in the UK -- Cambridge students cancel fancy dress party fearing 'potential for offence'. That's my old university, and I can certainly imagine that sort of argument taking place when I was there, back in the 1970s, particularly if (as I suspect, reading between the lines) something bad had happened at the previous fancy dress do, and the party organisers didn't want a repeat.

However, back then it would have been settled by arguments in the college bar and possibly by an open meeting of the Junior Combination Room (a Cambridge College's version of a student union) and the most publicity it would have received would have been short and (if I was writing it) bitchy piece in the student newspaper, which I co-edited for a while. Because of the wonders of social media, though, in 2016 the argument got amplified all over the world.

So, I don't think today's students are necessarily any more sensitive or touchy than were my generation of students. It's just they get an awful lot more publicity than did we, particularly when they do or say something that sounds foolish.

 

[Kara Spengler]

Micro aggressions are a sign of disrespect. Passive/negligent/oblivious or active/hostile/intentional... Doesn't matter. You don't fix the problem by rewarding it with silence and compliance. It won't just go away, it will get worse... As people explore how far they can push before getting called out on it.

I'm not saying make a scene every time, that's tiresome. Randomness is essential, if that can't predict how your will react, they're going to at least think twice before they go pushing buttons. Which, though not much, is still more consideration than they were giving before.

Exactly. If someone does something and is called out on it what is important is do they continue to do it knowing it is problematic. The first time they can argue they might not have known so I would be willing to cut them some slack but they do not have that excuse in the future.

 

[Jopsy Pendragon]

A couple of years ago we had something similar here in the UK -- Cambridge students cancel fancy dress party fearing 'potential for offence'.

And it's really too easy to "share" stories that are biased and out of context, especially for partisans looking for anecdotes that validate their particular mindset.

Usual formula: "See? Our side is completely reasonable and sane because (detailed and exaggerated reasons) and their side (all actual details and nuance redacted, replaced with projections and speculations) is just being emotional and crazy! As always! Lynch them all before it spreads!!! Ahem.. um... Just kidding!"

Oh look... I'm doing it myself too.

 

[Kara Spengler]

And it's really too easy to "share" stories that are biased and out of context, especially for partisans looking for anecdotes that validate their particular mindset.

Usual formula: "See? Our side is completely reasonable and sane because (detailed and exaggerated reasons) and their side (all actual details and nuance redacted, replaced with projections and speculations) is just being emotional and crazy! As always! Lynch them all before it spreads!!! Ahem.. um... Just kidding!"

Oh look... I'm doing it myself too.

Yes, realised that issue with the story I posted about. Although the only way I could have solved it would have been to unblock people (and hoped they did not delete/edit things since posting), screenshot everything, then edit the images to cross out all names, usernames, and pics. Then there would still be the issue of explaining how certain words were insults (and used as such).

 

[Jopsy Pendragon]

Then there would still be the issue of explaining how certain words were insults (and used as such).

Pfff.... "HAVE A NICE DAY!" can be an insult along the lines of "Leave this establishment NOW or I'll bite your F-ing nose off and shove it up your ass!!"

It was clear to everyone present the intent behind the words, though technically I stuck to the employee handbook on dealing with customers.

Anyone that needs to have explained how certain words were insults is clearly too stupid to understand the explanation.

 

[Kara Spengler]

Pfff.... "HAVE A NICE DAY!" can be an insult along the lines of "Leave this establishment NOW or I'll bite your F-ing nose off and shove it up your ass!!"

It was clear to everyone present the intent behind the words, though technically I stuck to the employee handbook on dealing with customers.

Anyone that needs to have explained how certain words were insults is clearly too stupid to understand the explanation.

Well, some of the insults people might not realize were insults. Or the multi-layered subcontext of my jokingly using a word in Lakota ('I am surprised you did not say ...') when talking to people using being American Indians as some sort of shield.

 

[Essence Lumin]

Pfff.... "HAVE A NICE DAY!" can be an insult along the lines of "Leave this establishment NOW or I'll bite your F-ing nose off and shove it up your ass!!"

It was clear to everyone present the intent behind the words, though technically I stuck to the employee handbook on dealing with customers.

That sounds rather close to "a backhanded compliment".

 

[Jorus Xi]

Y'know I've never actually SEEN this shit outside of internet forums and tumblr, so much like every other gripe about "TEH MELINIALS ARE RUINING ________" I'm just going to assume this is all bullshit.

 

[Ashiri]

Y'know I've never actually SEEN this shit outside of internet forums and tumblr, so much like every other gripe about "TEH MELINIALS ARE RUINING ________" I'm just going to assume this is all bullshit.

It may be bullshit, but I have seen something similar when I was at university back when Gen X was ruining everything.
The number of posers who come from comfortably middle class families though...