Tell us your Second Life friendship story


New member
Sep 23, 2018
In the spirit of the love story thread, I thought it would be good to have a place to post your Second Life relationships that have been platonic, but no less life-changing. I have two to share.

When I first joined SL, I was in a bad RL relationship that was turning abusive. I was stuck at home a lot and cut off from other people and emotional support. Thankfully, I found what I was missing in SL.

The first of my two most important friendships was Brandy. I was looking for someone to help me manage events on my estate and a mutual friend recommended her. She was a single mom who couldn’t get out much, and was trying to build a real life income through SL. We ended up becoming great friends. We would talk on Voice for hours about all kinds of things, and sometimes we wouldn’t even talk much, just have a call connected so we wouldn’t feel so alone. Brandy had survived an abusive relationship, and sometimes she would hear my then-partner in the background during one of her tirades. She eventually started gently talking to me about it, pointing out how her ex-husband used to say and do many of the same things. She helped me to realize I was being abused, and she was a big part of why I was finally able to get out of that relationship. Unfortunately Brandy passed away from cancer a few years ago. She was only 42 years old. I still miss her every day.

For my second friendship story, first a bit of background info. I’ve always loved musical theatre, and back in the 1990s I was a huge Phantom of the Opera fan. I used to go see the musical repeatedly in San Francisco and anywhere else I could. But by the mid 2000s, I had largely moved on to other interests. When I heard a rumor there was an actress who had played Christine in Phantom who performed in Second Life, I didn’t believe it. I dismissed the rumor and forgot all about it. Several months later, I decided to start having live music on my land, and once again heard there was a well-known musical theatre actress in SL. So I did a Google search, and Tamra popped up. I recognized her name from back when I was a big Phantom fan. A few days later I attended one of her concerts and was amazed.

Long story short, I started helping her out at her shows, and we became friends. My abusive partner did not care for this. Once when we were on a voice call, my then-partner came in and threatened to break my headset if I didn’t get off the phone. That was a sign of abuse I couldn’t ignore or dismiss. Like Brandy, Tamra encouraged me to get out of the bad relationship. When I had the chance to take a last-minute cross-country road trip to my first SL music jam, she encouraged me to go for it, and we got to meet in person for the first time. That trip changed my life and gave me the courage I needed to get out of the abusive relationship. Tamra rarely performs in SL these days, but we are still close friends and I travel to her RL shows, or just to visit, a few times a year.

I have met other wonderful friends through SL also. I mostly only log in for business reasons these days, but I'll always be thankful for the connections I made in SL when I needed support the most.

How about you?
Sep 21, 2018
Joined SLU
July 2007
SLU Posts
I have a few SL friends but I've only met one IRL, I mentioned him in the other thread. He lives about an hour away from my mum so we sometimes meet up for an afternoon when I'm visiting her. We call each other on the phone and chat on Discord/Skype as well. I have other friends that I now know on other platforms like maybe FB friends or whatever, but I haven't met any of them face-to-face though it would be nice to.

ETA: Oh, and I have a friend who lives in Germany and we made vague plans to meet when I went there but it didn't work out.
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Reactions: Brenda Archer


Feted Inner Collective Farmer <3
Sep 20, 2018
SL Rez
Joined SLU
SLU Posts
My current co-designers for Glitter & Doom, MonchromeReflections and AlwaysWitty did not meet in sl, but they have spent a LOT of time here and it has enhanced their interactions with each other. Originally they met in about, 2007ish. She was 13, he was 17, both just misfit teens that had no friends in school and spent time in vampire and horror movie discussion forums. They are, essentially, siblings and talk every day. Second life has enhanced their interactions and gave them the idea of "we leave six hours from each other, we can go see a movie at a theater in real life too."

That aspect of SL is important, because its not just talking about doing things in a chat room, its actually doing things and experiencing things and doing collaborative projects. I'm sure there are better stories about people who actually met in secondlife, but our little world has so inspired these two that they met in real life! Just today, in fact. I think they're probably watching some horror movie right now.

Imnotgoing Sideways

Puts the FU in Cute
Sep 22, 2018
When is it okay to refer to someone as a friend? I'm quite aware of people I like, but wonder about how presumptuous it is to assume anything is mutual.