Melania: define bully

[Nika Talaj]

So. Like an idiot, I watched Melania's recent interview where she stated that she is probably one of the most bullied persons on earth. She seems to share a feeling with her husband that criticism or even rumor-mongering about oneself is at least bullying, if not libel. She keeps referring to how wonderful the US is, but she doesn't appear to understand enough about it to embrace free speech.

Dearest Melania, here is the definition of bullying:

bul·ly1
ˈbo͝olē/
verb
gerund or present participle: bullying

1. use superior strength or influence to intimidate (someone), typically to force him or her to do what one wants.

So NO, random people insulting you on the internet are not bullying you, because compared to you they have no strength, and they have only the influence you grant them. You are the first lady. Unless someone physically assaults you or blackmails you, I don't think you can claim to be bullied at all. Even your husband is not in a position to do much in the way of bullying.

And it is astonishing that you say you're leading an initiative to cut down on internet bullying, when you don't seem to know what it is.

Could you perhaps be actually leading an initiative to cut down on free speech?

 

[Bartholomew Gallacher]

You're definition of bullying is so 1980s by today's standards. You are pretending, as if cyberbullying is not a thing and not there at all, which is bad. Furthermore blaming the victims of cyberbullying to be reponsible on their own to get bullied, like you argued, now really gets me worried, because this transparent excuse normally comes from the wrongdoers every time to belittle their own part, sometimes even to justify it.

And I really do wonder how you would feel if you were the target of the wild speculations in the press, which Melania Trump must read and endure all of the time about her state of marriage and such. Not that I am a fan of the Trumps, mind you, but the pressure on her and mud getting thrown at her day by day is real.

And free speech yes, is one thing, but here's your comic about that one:

 

[Nika Talaj]

You're definition of bullying is so 1980s by today's standards. You are pretending, as if cyberbullying is not a thing and not there at all, which is bad. Furthermore blaming the victims of cyberbullying to be reponsible on their own to get bullied, like you argued, now really gets me worried, because this transparent excuse normally comes from the wrongdoers every time to belittle their own part, sometimes even to justify it.

And I really do wonder how you would feel if you were the target of the wild speculations in the press, which Melania Trump must read and endure all of the time about her state of marriage and such. Not that I am a fan of the Trumps, mind you, but the pressure on her and mud getting thrown at her day by day is real.

You have a point about the 80's definition. But I don't understand the phrase I've bolded, perhaps say it again in another way?

I still do not think people railing at Melania on the internet qualifies as bullying her, because she is not threatened in any way by their words. She is in a position of power. It is NOT like a 13-year old being endlessly beaten down on FB by people that s/he has to go to school with. Melania will never meet the vast majority of the people reacting to her, and doesn't actually NEED to read their words at all. As she explained (?) about her coat, she doesn't really care what people say about her. She is focused on her goals. The words of ranters on the internet have no power over her, because the people saying them aren't going to walk up to her the next day at school and demand she take off her shirt or give them her money.

Don't forget, Melania has a security staff. Since marrying Trump, she has ALWAYS had security personnel. The secret service goes over her feeds with a fine-toothed comb, looking for people who might pose an actual threat. I'm sure that Dr. Christine Ford, who will be fielding death threats for the rest of her life, envies Mrs. Trump that perq of wealth and power.

 

[danielravennest]

Melania is the First Lady, which is a public office, though not an elected one. She's the official hostess for White House functions, of which there are quite a few, and has an office of staff to help her. Anyone in public office is open to criticism in the US. Political speech is the most protected kind of free speech. If she didn't want to be exposed to that, she shouldn't have taken the job, or turn it over to someone else. Hilary Clinton resigned as First Lady when she was running for senator in New York, because she would not be available while campaigning. Her daughter Chelsea took over the job until the campaign was over.

So my comment to Melania is "if you can't take the heat, get out of the White House kitchen, bitch."

Any claims as to "I didn't know what the job would be like" are for naught. There were four living ex-First Ladies she could have talked to, to find out.

 

[Free]

My only response to Melania:

 

[Ishina]

You're definition of bullying is so 1980s by today's standards. You are pretending, as if cyberbullying is not a thing and not there at all, which is bad.

But what makes cyberbullying so bad is that actual bullying is spilling over into one's private life. A kid who is getting bullied at school can no longer be safe at home or in private, since the internet and social media gives the bullies access to you everywhere. It's an extra angle of attack. These attacks also have permanency in the sense that the kid has to face their bullies at school after they have already been bullying the kid at home, and they are now armed with a hard copy of the kid's humiliation to refer to. The bullying is no longer just circumstantial or opportunism or recurring physical encounters, but sustained like a constant background radiation and a matter of permanent record, and thus more insidiously part of the victims life.

That's not what's happening to Melania. With online criticism being the only angle of attack, she isn't really experiencing bullying like a kid at school might experience it. You can call it bullying of a kind, but its certainly not the truly harmful kind that many victims experience and you'd be using the loosest possible definition of the word. She isn't trapped in it and she has nothing truly to fear about it. If she chose to not read comments, that would effectively end it.

 

[Innula Zenovka]

Melania is the First Lady, which is a public office, though not an elected one.

Is there a statutory or constitutional basis for the role of "First Lady" or any statutory definition of that person's duties and responsibilities? If not, I'm not at all sure that it's accurate to describe it as a "public office."

 

[Jopsy Pendragon]

If I were a woman barely able to speak English, third wife to a crooked, adulterous, megalomaniac, misogynistic, racist, mushroom-dicked, toxic, narcissistic, typecast tyrant on reality TV, man baby... Then yeah, I'd probably claim to be the most bullied person on Earth too.

ICYMI: We Can’t Stop Watching Sad Melania at Inauguration

 

[danielravennest]

Is there a statutory or constitutional basis for the role of "First Lady" or any statutory definition of that person's duties and responsibilities? If not, I'm not at all sure that it's accurate to describe it as a "public office."

She literally has an office in the White House, and staff which are paid out of the budget for the White House, like the other parts of the Executive Office of the President. The overall budget and staffing are set by Congress, but the President has wide discretion to arrange duties and personnel. But I would say her office is just as much one as press secretary or presidential advisor (whom Donnie has seen fit to assign to his daughter and son-in-law).

Typically the First Lady is responsible for renovation and maintenance of the White House as a building, and public functions, like White House dinners and other public ceremonies. They also typically choose a personal cause to support.

 

[GoblinCampFollower]

Semantics around the world "bullying" aren't really important to the bigger issue. No matter who is in office, a grand shitload of misogynistic things get said about the first lady. It is completely unproductive and ridiculous.

I'm very consistently against going after the families of famous people for guilt by association. I always think that if one of my crazy, right wing relatives ran for office, I'd not want to be associated with it.

Michelle Obama had a lot of the most vile racist shit said about her, and she took it like a champion being hit by small children. I think it's fair to say that Melania isn't as strong or as smart as Michelle, but why should she have to be? The President needs to have the backbone to take rivers of abuse, but I really don't think the first lady (or hypothetical first man) should have to.

This might sound like a weird point of view, but the fact that Melania is a third trophy wife makes me more, not less sympathetic to her. I think The last few first ladies planned on being political forces on their own and knew what to expect. For Melania, I am sure this was a huge load on top of the role her and Donald discussed.

 

[Cristiano]

 

[Veritable Quandry]

Is there a statutory or constitutional basis for the role of "First Lady" or any statutory definition of that person's duties and responsibilities? If not, I'm not at all sure that it's accurate to describe it as a "public office."

No. The office has grown from tradition and precedent, and it is provided a budget, but the duties shift with each administration depending on the interests and abilities of the presidential spouse.

 

[Jolene Benoir]

Well, she just recently admitted that her "I really don't care, do you?" coat was indeed a message. It was aimed at "the people who criticize me and the left-wing media". She would prefer that people focus on what she does rather than what she wears. Mrs. Obama, anyone? As I recall, she was called a monkey, a man's name and more due to wearing a sleeveless outfit. This is what happens with first ladies. What they wear IS what is focused on. As far as left-wing media and criticism, well, she's putting herself out there with that statement. If she wants anyone to believe her attempts at limiting cyber-bullying, she really should start with the biggest one of all, her husband. Let's not forget her support of her husband's birther campaign. She doesn't want to be criticized? Well...she's a public figure doing public things.. Of course she is gong to be criticized, good and bad. By criticized, in this context, I mean criticism directed at her political efforts. Apparently, like her husband, that is a problem for her.

No sympathy here. She's giving as good as she is getting.

Melania: 'Don't care' jacket was a message

"It's obvious I didn't wear the jacket for the children, I wore the jacket to go on the plane and off the plane," she said.

"It was for the people and for the left-wing media who are criticising me. I want to show them I don't care. You could criticise whatever you want to say. But it will not stop me to do what I feel is right."

Mrs Trump criticised the media for being "obsessed" about her clothing.

"I often asking myself, if I had not worn that jacket, if I will have so much media coverage," she said, adding: "I would prefer they would focus on what I do and on my initiatives than what I wear."

 

[Jolene Benoir]

More: About sums up my feelings regarding her, as well.

Is Melania clueless or cruelest First Lady? - NY Daily News

Mind you, the First Lady of the United States said this just a weeks after the incomprehensibly tragic suicide of 9-year old Jamel Myles of Denver, who killed himself because he was bullied for being gay. She said this even though 4,400 kids commit suicide every year, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, with bullied kids two times to nine times more likely to consider suicide than nonvictims.
But this insanely rich, entitled woman is the most bullied person in the world.

 

[Sid]

This might sound like a weird point of view, but the fact that Melania is a third trophy wife makes me more, not less sympathetic to her. I

I see her as a gold digger. She wanted a billionaire and she got one.
She most likely has researched him before throwing out the bate towards him. She knew what personality she got on the hook and accepted it.
I have not so much sympathy for her to be honest.

 

[GoblinCampFollower]

I see her as a gold digger. She wanted a billionaire and she got one.
She most likely has researched him before throwing out the bate towards him. She knew what personality she got on the hook and accepted it.
I have not so much sympathy for her to be honest.

I don't think gold diggers are inherently immoral if it's understood by both parties. I don't think sex workers should be blamed for their clients either. She wasn't planning on being first lady. Donald ran for President every election as a stunt, and accidentally caught a big wave.

 

[Ishina]

I'm very consistently against going after the families of famous people for guilt by association.

There's a difference between guilt by association and knowingly associating with the guilty.

 

[Sid]

I don't think gold diggers are inherently immoral if it's understood by both parties. I don't think sex workers should be blamed for their clients either. She wasn't planning on being first lady. Donald ran for President every election as a stunt, and accidentally caught a big wave.

Gold diggers and sex workers are two very different things IMHO.
Sex worker is a profession (at least here in the Netherlands)
Gold digger is a life style.

 

[GoblinCampFollower]

Gold diggers and sex workers are two very different things IMHO.
Sex worker is a profession (at least here in the Netherlands)
Gold digger is a life style.

But you know what I mean. I don't mean to say they are the same thing, I mean to say that gold digging isn't any more immoral if both parties are on to it. Donald likely was.

 

[GoblinCampFollower]

There's a difference between guilt by association and knowingly associating with the guilty.

Donald was just some other silly rich dude when she married him. It would be a whole world of difference if she came running to him once his campaign started. There are plenty of conservative women who would do that now.