Individual = dumb? A rant about conformity pressure

Jupiter Rowland

The one with the Roth2 v2
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It's possible to simply do your own thing within the tastes etc of the larger group ...I tend to do my own thing -but I do it within the confines of what I know people will like. Because banging your head against group tastes and expectations is a sure-fire way to be in a never-ending state of frustration.
Well, I've found my peer groups that accept me as well as Juno. It just goes on my nerves how some think just because I don't do things like everyone, I'm too dumb to do things like everyone.

You mention sex there:
a)I don't believe the current crop of folks in opensim even HAS sex, they mostly seem to go around and go to parties.
Virtual sex has died down a lot since around 2021. Ask Miss Xi. The times of walking into Ruritania with a 60% chance of ending up in at least a small sex orgy are over since people can fuck in real life again.

b)If you want to attract people to have sex -you have to be attractive. No -sorry, Ruth2 isn't going to cut it, just simply straight up. Among other reasons the head is still the original Avastar head. And considering the complexity of modelling heads that is unlikely to change. Ruth2 aside, the primary rule is that for slex (particularly casual slex) you either have to know and accept the norms of what's considered attractive or settle for slexing people you have a personal bond with (in other words: friends with benefits). If people want Bikers you're gonna attract less flies if you run around looking like Conan or Hugh Hefner or Superman or Captain Kirk or...
In an interesting twist of fate, Juno does manage to turn quite a number of guys' heads. It's probably because she isn't your standard overdone Athena fare with an unmodified standard shape, and because she's the cute girl next door rather than playing the "sexy beeyawtch" card. She's something that you don't see every day, a dozen a dime.

It's just annoying that some people can't stop blaring out that a) female avatars have to bare their arses in order to count as sexy, and b) female avatars have to be according-to-this-definition sexy 24/7, no matter where. Wearing a skirt that touches your thighs? Wearing shoes that don't require your feet to be in high position? Waddle off to your fucking retirement home, grandma!

If you send a female avatar onto a winter sim in clothes that are appropriate for winter and for walking on snow, you're a goddamn fucking brain-dead moron because you don't know fucking shit about making good female avatars, and you fucking deserve the barrage of swear words thrown at you. That's how some people think.

And wearing layer clothes made before 2015 on a BoM mesh body, while the only way to pull off certain things even on an Athena 6 or an eBody Reborn, is an unspeakable horror to those people because they couldn't imagine for the lives of them that someone would actually do that.

That's why I'm glad we're usually around people who not only don't mind if someone wears pre-2010 Linda Kellie layer clothes on a mesh body that isn't from SL, but who actually appreciate it if it actually manages to look good.

Additionally, I've suspected for years that a large number of people in opensim are there because their personalities don't allow them to do well in SL.
The Hypergrid is chock-full of people who have been banned from SL and who came to OpenSim because they can't be banned from there, no matter what they do. Same reason why OpenSim is so attractive for paedos.

And if you try to put a price tag on it on Opensim someone will rip it as a point of pride and then the distribution problem is no longer yours either.
Not to mention the copybotting mafiya and their faithful followers who try to mob that someone out of OpenSim for being a commercial shill. And the people who believe that "NeVeR bUy In OpEnSiM!1!!" was coined by the OpenSim devs at some point, and that it's an official OpenSim credo. Just like "ShArE oR dIe!1!!"
 

Monica Dream

Jesus -he knows me ...and he knows I'm right!
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Dec 21, 2019
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"some people"
Who are these people?
Why are you letting them live rent-free in your head?

It's particularly confusing because you've said that you have friends who accept how you dress up. So with that being the case -who gives a dead rat about the haters?

Also it's not only the banned I mean -I mean there's a METRIC FUCK-TON of dysfunctional personalities in opensim -a far higher percentage than there is in SL.

Opensim has always been more toxic than SL, as far as I've ever seen. And I'm not even talking about the people who are banned from SL...there are plenty of opensim folks who would be allowed into SL (not banned) but would never find any joy in SL because they can't play nice and lack social skills. And that's why they're in opensim.
 
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Monica Dream

Jesus -he knows me ...and he knows I'm right!
Joined
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WolfEyes

Well known member no one knows
Joined
Sep 20, 2018
Messages
4,144
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2004
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2009
Mods...


MOOOOOODDDSSS....



Actually, I find almost everyone likes me and its honestly kind of annoying sometimes because in my head I secretly want to be a rude bad bitch but I can't....
Everyone thinks I'm a rude bad bitch when I'm not*. Wanna trade?


*I can be I just don't like having to be.
 

Kamilah Hauptmann

Shitpost Sommelier
Joined
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Cat Country (Can't Stop Here)
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Actually, I find almost everyone likes me and its honestly kind of annoying sometimes because in my head I secretly want to be a rude bad bitch but I can't....
Self solving problem. Let it rip.
 
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Jupiter Rowland

The one with the Roth2 v2
Joined
May 31, 2023
Messages
34
Location
Grid time + 9 hours
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2020
I don't have experience with this, it sounds like it may be a good idea to hang out at a differnet grid.
Well, it has little to do with specific grids.

And besides, I'm a traveller, an explorer. I'm none of those who always only stick to their home grid. So I keep travelling to other grids and bumping into people from yet other grids. Not to mention that I don't only have one avatar on one small grid.

I know people who rarely go Hypergridding. I know people who literally never go Hypergridding. I know people who only ever Hypergrid to one place on one sim on one grid, but nowhere else. I'm none of these. I'm the one who tells these people what the Hypergrid beyond their little corner looks like.

Also, stuff like this doesn't just happen in-world. It may just as well happen in discussions in places like OpenSimWorld.

Lastly, let's suppose I went elsewhere to find another community of people who don't know me yet and who aren't regularly visited by my old community. There wouldn't be many left to join. First, I can rule out all communities that aren't nearly in my timezone. Sorry, Americans, but I won't get up in the middle of the night to attend your parties. (6 pm grid time is 3 am here.) Then I can rule out all communities that speak a language I don't. Gone are the French, the Italians etc. Then I can rule out all communities whose parties I can't enjoy because the music sucks. Of course, I can also rule out all communities that won't tolerate my little in-world sister Juno for whichever reasons.

Then I can rule out all communities that defend copybotting teeth and claw, especially those whose core members copybot themselves and/or acquire no-transfer "exclusive" items that were copybotted by someone else just to god-mode them and put them in their own stores. They will be strongly opposed to any legal content. They will try to talk me out of it. They will call everything that makes up my avatars ugly for not being on the same level of aethestic quality as all that copybotted premium luxury payware from Second Life. They will try to force a stolen body plus stolen clothes plus stolen everything else upon me. And the more vehemently I'll reject all that stuff, the more they'll call me an idiot. Lastly, they'll expel me for causing "drama" (anything from criticising content theft to announcing legal actions against it = "drama" = bannable offence).

Then I can rule out all communities full of sim builders who put convenience above immersion and/or realism and who, at the same time, take criticism for their sims in any shape or form as personal insults. They won't take kindly if a "newbie" suggests they make their sims walkable rather than relying on teleporters for everything. They won't even accept suggestions on how to make beaches more usable as actual beaches because "literally nobody" does that, so why bother?

And so forth.

No, the community I'm with is one of the best I could have ended up with.

And I'm not talking about the hassle of moving to another grid yet. Find a good grid with a good community (see all above) where I can make a home (an actual home as in a building to live in, not just set home in the viewer) for Juno and me. Gather all the stuff we need, some of which will have to be god-moded because it's a) no-transfer and b) not available anywhere anymore. Furnish the building. Re-create hundreds of outfits for myself and thousands for Juno. Et cetera.

That's why I don't like moving grids.
 
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Kamilah Hauptmann

Shitpost Sommelier
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Cat Country (Can't Stop Here)
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Joined SLU
Reluctantly
Lastly, they'll expel me for causing "drama"
It is difficult to get banned from here. Ordinarily what happens is someone arrives with an axe to grind, works up into a froth at the lack of sympathy and attention, then will quit in disgust. Sometimes multiple times.

No, the community I'm with is one of the best I could have ended up with.
This is very normal, moving around until you find a good place to hang your hat.
 
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