Excellent article about how to argue online

Innula Zenovka

Nasty Brit
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Sep 20, 2018
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#41
When people refuse to act in good faith, changing goalposts, I ignore them. I rarely let them know I've ignored them to avoid thread drama.
I don't argue in Twitter very often, but in places where I do argue, if someone starts trying to change the goalposts or anything like, I politely point out to them what they are doing, firmly put the goalposts back where they should be, and restate my point even more clearly.

They don't normally pursue the argument that long once they realise I'm not so easily distracted or deflected.
 

detrius

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Sep 20, 2018
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#42
I have a bunch of txt-files in my desktop folder where I wrote elaborate responses to posts that seriously pissed me off, often because some poster misstated my position or flat-out made things up.

But then I just thought "fuck it" and moved on.
 
Last edited:
Sep 19, 2018
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a sunburnt country
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#43
But then I just thought "fuck it" and moved on.
A test I regularly apply to my posting is that after I've written out a reply, I ask myself "do you think anyone else really gives a fuck?"

That's probably saved me a whole lot of arguments over the years.
 

Noodles

Queen of Ramen
Sep 20, 2018
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#44
I confess I have a hard time with that sometimes. It's even worse when I am convinced I am right, but later on down the road, I discover they had been right all along.
You are not allowed to admit that ever. It's against the law.
 

Kamilah Hauptmann

This Reality Blows
Sep 20, 2018
1,112
Cat Country (Can't Stop Here)
#45
Ignore function helps too when it comes to that magic personality combo that would ordinarily make me come right uncunted. It hides threads hy those posters though, also hides quotes which can leave some replies looking rather Dadaist.

Clearing the ignore list every so often feels a good faith thing to do as well, even though my short list has been so honed over the years it usually ends up right back as it was within a week. Mileage may vary.
 

craz

mostly asleep
Oct 3, 2018
65
England
#46
RE: Excellent article about how to argue online

Oh no it isnt!!!

*runs off back into the shrubbery*
 

Tigger

not on speaking terms with the voices in my head
Sep 24, 2018
330
#47
I have a bunch of txt-files in my desktop folder where I wrote elaborate responses to posts that seriously pissed me off, often because some poster misstated my position or flat-out made things up.

But then I just thought "fuck it" and moved on.
Very long replies are excellent ways to prevent you posting in anger. By the time you've done researching, formatting, spell checking, you've burned up most of your anger. "Go fuck yourself" may be more satisfying to post but it doesn't help your own self image much.

As an aside, twitter can actually be useful, complaining very publicly to corporate twitter accounts can get you way more response than going through helplines and more conventional channels
 

Brenda Archer

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Sep 21, 2018
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#48
I’m on Twitter, mostly as a way to keep up with the headspace of the Left. My feed, as set up, is still less offensive than corporate TV news.

But it’s obvious some right wing posters easily resort to the same gaslighting techniques as abusers and bullies. I will engage them if I think they might derail a good thread someone has given thought to. Mostly, all I have to do is show them how they are gaslighting. It doesn’t work if you can see it.

This is because trying to argue with a gaslighter’s misdirections and ad hominems is walking into his carefully set trap. I stay meta and address the gaslighting rather than try to get a discussion going. It works well enough because right wing gaslighters are very predictable.
 

Brenda Archer

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#49
Edit to add: I realize this technique can look pretty aggressive to a bystander who doesn’t see the gaslighting. They just see my refusal to validate the misdirections and ad hominems. People can think you’re mean if you refuse to soothe what is presented as hurt feelings. But this kind of “hurt feelings” is a gaslighting technique. It’s dishonest.
 
Sep 20, 2018
163
RL: NZ / EVE: 1DQ1-A & Niarja / SL: Jessie
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#50
Just wanted to add something about game forums and Discourse (software).
Blizzard (and CCP) use Discourse for forum software and by design it doesn't allow for ignoring posters. This has led to a rather nasty environment in the case of the WoW forums.
 
Sep 20, 2018
190
#51
Edit to add: I realize this technique can look pretty aggressive to a bystander who doesn’t see the gaslighting. They just see my refusal to validate the misdirections and ad hominems. People can think you’re mean if you refuse to soothe what is presented as hurt feelings. But this kind of “hurt feelings” is a gaslighting technique. It’s dishonest.
I think that if their bad intentions aren't clear, it often makes sense to just keep asking clarifying questions until it's more exposed.
 

Dakota Tebaldi

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#54
HA!

As if -I- need a lesson on how to get into an argument on the internet. :cool:
 

Khamon

Irish Harper
Sep 23, 2018
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#56
We need an excellent article describing how to argue online about an excellent article about to argue online.
 

Free

FIGHT FORUM AVATAR OPPRESSION
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#57
We need an excellent article describing how to argue online about an excellent article about to argue online.
No we don't.